A sexual relationship between a man and a woman is recognized to be a very natural and personal activity. The desire to be sexually satisfied is natural after entering the adult phase for both men and women. There are some people for whom the topic and the conversation about sex are taboo which should not be. Because of the tag of taboo, people are not able to discuss and express how they really feel or go through. Going through post-sex blues is one of such situations about which most people do not know. It is, therefore, necessary for all-out us to know and understand everything about this particular topic.
What does post-sex blue mean?
Post sex blues i.e. Postcoital dysphoria also known as postcoital tristesse is considered to be a situation when any of the two partners gets inexplicable feelings of sadness or agitation, anxiety, and also slight depression even if the intercourse was satisfactory and loving enough. Some people get badly hit by anxiety after an enjoyable orgasm. Both of the partners can go through postcoital dysphoria.
Many of the people do not even know that it is postcoital dysphoria that is affecting them and giving them the discomfort of anxiety. Postcoital dysphoria is a common circumstance. Due to lack of knowledge, partners go through emotional turmoil as they think that the reason for the feeling low is something else, something about their relationship. Therefore sex education and knowledge about the natural feelings associated with it are essential and required.
Reasons for Postcoital dysphoria
- Emotional connection
When a man and a woman get close for getting physically intimate, after intercourse it is a natural need to have a love session when there are talks about random topics or the intercourse itself, or some other stuff like taking care of each other. If this does not happen, the chance of experiencing postcoital dysphoria increases. The lack of intimacy after sex results in post-sex blues.
- Being against sexual needs
The nature of not expressing the intimate needs while being physically involved with someone is another reason. Unfulfilled intimate needs other than sex due to lack of communication leads to postcoital dysphoria. If the sex life of a particular person does not reflect what are his/her needs, that is when postcoital dysphoria gets triggered because it is obvious to go through it as the person is not receiving what he/she needs.
- Unfulfilled expectations
When someone decides to get intimate with anyone, he/she definitely has some sexual expectations. When such expectations do not get fulfilled, it consequences in postcoital dysphoria. If the satisfactory expectations do not get fulfilled, and the sexual experience does not turn out according to the expectations, it creates a feeling of loneliness and anxiety.
- Shyness or past memories
When a person experiences sex for the first time, in most cases it does not go according to the expectations and imaginations. There are many reasons for it, It can be due to shyness or no experience.
In some cases, people who are survivors of a bad past, like being sexually harassed or any memory that creates a feeling of discomfort regarding sex, gets triggered while getting intimate with anyone. This is also a reason for post-sex blues.
Treatment for postcoital dysphoria
- Know what you exactly want
The first most step to cure postcoital dysphoria for a person is to know what he/she actually likes and what are his/her needs and expectations from their partner. That is when there are chances of being sexually satisfied.
- Do not force yourself
There is no need for a person to forcefully do anything without his/her consent to fulfill his/her partner’s wishes. this way the person is not only forcing himself/herself but he/she will not be able to fulfill his/her partner’s wish as well because anything done forcefully does not give good results.
- Accept the reality
Postcoital dysphoria is a very common reality. Yes, many of us do not know about it but it is important to be patient with this situation. Some people overthink to the extent that they think about having an unknown disease which is not the truth, therefore overthinking is not a solution. It rather worsens the phase after sex.
Postcoital dysphoria or post-sex blues are not the symptoms of any kind of disease; it is a natural phase which many people go through. It is not a matter to be worried about. Being clear with the sexual needs and expectations is a way to avoid this situation.
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